Things I've Learned

A week before I leave Lima for JFK-PDX-EUG-EWR. Here are several bits of wisdom that I've acquired along the way:

-If you're going to Africa, purchase an airplane ticket to Africa. Go there. If you're going to Paris, buy a ticket to Paris and go.

-If you're planning to go to Paris via Africa, do not get on the bus in Portland. You will not make it past Perú.

-If you're going to Lima, consider going to Buenos Aires instead.

-It's worth learning Spanish for Fito Paez alone. Don't make me embed more youtube videos.

-Don't pour boiling water into a cold glass. Unless like you like blisters.

-Don't confuse water with beer, especially when making papaya juice.

-Don't mess with snakes. No exceptions.